It should be all fun and games, but somehow it doesn't bode too well for our protagonist...
Translators: Kurosmith & Kalkin
Proofreaders: Kalkin + imoutolicious
Please enjoy.
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“I shall formally introduce her to you once more, Onii-sama.”
In the midst of countless people watching her in awe, the 《Princess
of Pure Darkness》 slowly opens her mouth.
“This very child is the strongest agent that we Bandersnatch take pride
in.”
Looking this way indifferently from Maria’s side, the eyes that Lily had
were terrifying. Devoid of emotion, it was a pool of empty darkness that spiralled
down endlessly.
She’s not acting here.
It’s not a practical joke she’s pulling here to intimidate me.
“With the code name 《Feo Pafisto》, she
is the fourth highest ranking officer of Ladies in Black — a
multipurpose special forces under the direct control of the head of Blackhazel.
I present to you...”
That’s right.
“—Major Lily Shupiel.”
Those girls, so to speak, are residents of another world.
◇ ◆ ◇
“Ahhh, no matter what clothes you wear, they all match you so well,
Onii-sama!”
Do they really? Or is she just blinded by love? But in a certain sense,
those words might be only natural since I’m wearing a handmade Italian designer
suit with an asking price of tens of thousands of dollars.
It’s an early morning at the Blackhazel mansion.
Today, Maria is attending an unofficial party for the members of polite
society— Not because of her requirement as the present head of the Blackhazel
family, but in response to an invitation from her personal acquaintance in the
business side.
The event is being hosted on a five-star luxury cruise ship.
Should I say it’s surprisingly plain? It really doesn’t strike me as
amazing, perhaps because it’s on a scale within normal people’s expectations.
Just so that there is no misunderstanding, it’s not from my personal point of
view.
“Heh~. In the end, isn’t it just casting pearls before swine?”
Donning a pair of black brand-name jeans, white blouse and black suit
jacket on top, it’s a casual look for Dorothy. As always, her choices in
clothing are consistent and fashionable from the standpoint that there are no
accessories with the exception of her necktie.
“These are not pearls but clothes, you damn little sister. So could you
call your older brother a winged pig from now on?”
After all, fine clothes makes for fine wings.
Thanks to all the abuse I had taken, this doesn’t even come off as
self-deprecating. Instead, it’s to the point where I think I got one back at
Dorothy.
So, you should have a general idea of how low my rank is within this household.
With the final touch on Maria’s evening dress by her personal
coordinator, all preparations are complete.
“It seems we are all set to go.”
Says Maria in a cheerful voice with her honey-blonde hair finely
braided into a chignon pinned by an ornamental hairpin to match the formality
of the occasion.
“Yes, Onee-sama!”
“……Lily, ready to launch.”
Dorothy seems to be in a really good mood. Maybe it’s because she’s
excited about going to the party today with her one and only Onee-sama. As
proof, she’s very much tame, unlike her usual impatient demeanor from not being
able to harass me.
Just how tame, you ask? Although I’m sitting right next to her in the
limousine, she wasn’t even complaining about it.
If it was her usual self, she would’ve definitely been making all sorts
of complaints and kicking me like a soccer ball.
“A party~♪ A joyful party with my Onee-sama~♪”
She’s just humming a tune and smiling happily like a kid.
That has got to be it.
Without a doubt, this girl is just a kid.
It doesn’t matter that
she’s a Blackhazel; in the end, Dorothy’s just a 17-year-old girl, a year
younger than me. She’s clearly different from Maria who’s been trained by years
of social experience with her position as the present head of the family. Well,
anyone would think she’s a normal girl too if they saw her acting this happy
over a simple family trip.
In such thoughts, I
look down on Dorothy with a wry smile of an adult.
But damn, I may have pushed my
luck too far.
Leaning against the
car window, Dorothy does a half turn and stomps down on my foot with all her
strength.
“Gaaahhhh!”
“You, your eyes are somehow
arrogant.”
“Oh wow, now you’re
just nitpicking!”
“I don’t like the way
you talk, too.”
Double hit.
“And that sleazy
attitude of yours, as well.”
Triple hit.
Along with the final
blow, my head gets planted to the floor of the car. But my bodyguard Lily is just
looking at me with a vacant stare, not saying a word and keeping silent.
“Hey! You’re my
bodyguard, right?! Are you just going to keep watching?! I’m about to get
beaten to death here!”
As I complain to Lily
while looking up at her from my current position…
“……Pff.”
She laughs at me.
You know, it’s not like
I want a rough-looking black guy with the sunglasses and all as my bodyguard.
In fact, a 12-year-old kid bodyguard isn’t so bad from the setting’s
perspective.
What I want is very
simple.
It’s not that hard at
all.
“Would you please at
least pretend to protect me?!”
“Hmph……. You, an
idiot?”
Coldly rejecting my
desperate plea, Lily quickly turns her head away with an outright, displeased look
on her face.
She does so flatly, without the slightest sign of regret or hesitation.
◇ ◆ ◇
After taking a private
jet from the Bucharest Otopeni International Airport, we land on the shores of
the Mediterranean Sea in Italy. Then switching to a limousine again, we ride to
the Molo Beverello of Naples where the cruise ship holding the party is
anchored.
It was quite late, and
the view outside had changed into nightfall.
The Royal Caribbean
International Freedom class cruise ship by the name of Liberty of the Seas was like an empire sailing on the sea.
Surprisingly plain? Within normal people’s expectations? I was totally
wrong about what I said before.
According to the schedule, the Liberty
of the Seas is slated to set sail tonight and return to port 3 days later.
I’m already hyped up from the thought of enjoying the so-named “leisure
of the upper echelons”.
From its indoor facility designed for on-board swimming and sunbathing to
the high-rise observation deck and dance hall for overlooking the Mediterranean
Sea in the night.
This cruise ship has everything.
Also, a third-class room here is equivalent to a hotel’s presidential
suit. As for us, it looks like we’re going to stay at a VVIP room.
Maria opens the door with the keycard, and I follow her into the room.
Just how amazing can a lodging
room get in the first place, huh? — I almost feel stupid for thinking that.
“Wow.”
The living room evokes the interior of a 19th century royal Arabian
palace, which became synonymous with pleasure and luxury. Sets of golden furniture and ceiling with
harmonized curves and checks. Looking at the ornaments and pieces of furniture
placed in the room, it’s evident that they put a lot of effort in historical
accuracy.
Already in the bedroom, Dorothy is jumping up and down happily on the
double bed like a kid.
Not wanting to needlessly get involved with her and incur her wrath, I
step outside to the balcony. Leaning my body against the railing, I enjoy the
night air of the Mediterranean Sea.
It really makes my heart race.
If I knew it was going to be this awesome from the beginning, I
wouldn’t have made fun of Dorothy for acting like a kid. Because right now, my
excitement level is over 9000.
Kids and adults are the same inside, so to speak. Well, it’s not like
I’m an adult, though.
“I’m on a boat!”
Sticking out the upper part of my body over the railing, I shout out to
the world.
The night sea, glittering like the scales of a fish under the
moonlight, touches the edge of the distant horizon with a dim glow. And every
time the waves roll, the lights break into grains of white sand and scatter across
the sea.
It‘s truly a captivating sight.
But if I were to fall into the open sea by accident, I’d sink like a
brick for sure.
Of course there’s no way a full-grown adult male would make that kind
of a ridiculous mistake. Besides, it’d be impossible even if you wanted to
unless this chest-high railing splits into two.
The problem in such case is that it would’ve been set up by somebody
with ill intentions.
As soon as that thought enters my mind, a cold sweat runs down my back.
“Hmm… So if this unfolds as it always has in my life, there’s no doubt
that it’s going to lead to disaster…”
But every cloud has a silver lining.
Keeping my composure in such situation, I notice the presence of a small,
lit incandescent light bulb above my head.
“Die, you pedophilic beast—!”
As soon as the sound of air being cut is heard, I lower myself sideways
and turn face about.
If Dorothy’s ferocious flying kick land on me, then it would push me
over into my watery grave.
However, if that kinetic energy’s intended target were to disappear…
At this height, it’s more than enough to make it work.
In other words, I can send this cyclonic flying kick into the open sea.
That’s right.
This is what the small, lit incandescent light bulb above my head meant.
“Hagyuu?!”
Having jumped over the railing with great force, Dorothy twists her body
around with all her strength while making a cute crying sound like a harp seal.
Eventually, she barely managed to grab and hang on to the outer edge of
the balcony with her two arms, and…… Well, she was in a position that main
characters in action movies often end up in.
But the problem is that this is real and not a scene from an action
movie.
“Fugyaaaaah—!?”
Taking a glance at the surging waves down below, Dorothy’s face turns
pale.
She turns her head to look up, and there I am with a triumphant smile.
To her, this situation is a pure nightmare.
“P-please help me!”
And this is coming from the person who tried to kill me? You sure have
a lot of nerve.
“Hello, Dorothy.”
I lower my tone as much I can to produce a low, mechanical voice.
“O-Onii-san…….”
“I want to play a game.”
“W-wait! N-no! Anything but that…!”
It seems you know a fair share of horror movies.
But you have nothing to worry about, my dear Dorothy.
I actually don’t like games that much.
So, in that sense…
“I’m just joking. Here, off you go!”
“Fu-nyan?! Kyaaaaaah—!”
Swift and without delay.
*splash*
Leaving the pleasant echo of vengeance behind, I put my hands in my
pockets and turn around, then walk away from the scene of the crime like a
boss.
◇ ◆ ◇
Unlike my wish, she didn’t get eaten by the sharks and unfortunately
came back alive.
She just came back with her whole body wrapped in seaweed and a cute
octopus stuck to her head.
And how do you think the story progressed afterward?
Well, I’ll leave that to your imagination.
thanks...*happy face* /人◕ ‿‿ ◕人\
ReplyDeleteWow, liberty of the seas? What a coincidence that's where I'm going on in 2 weeks. Awesome coincidence.
ReplyDeleteWow you really do keep your word.
ReplyDeleteTo me now your a true man of your words
Awesome chapter. Thanks.
ReplyDeletemixed feeling here , don't know if it is the good thing to let her fell to the sea .
ReplyDeleteHeyo! Me again.
ReplyDeleteThe second he had the light-bulb over his head I knew what was going to happen. And I had a smile larger than the Joker's. I can't wait for the next part, keep up the good work guys!.
During the whole last scene I kept hoping he would be the better man and help her. I was thinking about that scene in Pitch Black about remembering how it could have gone.
ReplyDeleteOh god, waves of nostalgia~ Pitch Black is such an epic movie!
DeleteDragon Ball & jig saw parody XD
ReplyDeleteI think u missed a reference point like im on a boat from the music video of im on a boat
ReplyDeleteThat shout-out to The Lonely Island is conspicuous. I mostly note elusive allusions.
DeleteThanks for Chapter.
ReplyDeleteThanks to Translators and Editors for doing this Chapter!
thanks for chap
ReplyDeletei was getting sick of mc just being bullied and tortured for no reason ,hopefully it'll change from now on